If you have watched a music video in the past decade, you probably did not watch it on MTV, a network now mostly stuck in a never-ending loop of episodes of Teen Mom. This fact does not stop MTV from continuing to hold the annual Video Music Awards, and it does not stop many of us from tuning in – or at least watching the most talked-about bits on YouTube. Whereas this year's Grammys were kind of depressing, we can count on the VMAs to be a slightly morally objectionable mess of good theatre. (MTV pretty much handed over the keys to Miley Cyrus, this year's host, after all.) Whether it's "real" or not doesn't matter. Each year, the VMAs deliver exactly one ugly, cringe-worthy and...
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